Questions for People
Conversation Best Practices
Every participant needs to feel seen and heard.
Before offering our thoughts, ask one more question.
Barriers to being present
Too much focus on ourselves
Too much of our attention is on what we will say next.
When navigating conflict
Lead with humility
Look for points of connection
Take a pause (time out). Say something like, “I’d love to talk more with you about this after I’ve had more time to think about it. Can we talk more tomorrow?”
Say something like, “Here’s what’s coming to mind right now…” The “now” implies my mind is not made up about the issue.
When talking to strangers
Carry a container of presence rather than a toolbox.
Usually starts with non-verbal communication: open posture, presence, making eye contact, smiling.
Empathy.
Don’t advise unless it’s asked for.
Give some thought to a question or two ahead of time.
Over many years, I accumulated a list of questions for various situations. Sometimes, when I want to initiate a conversation with a new person, I sneak a look at the list before the meeting. It helps a lot. So, I'm sharing it with you.
The window below is a Google Doc published as a web page. Its Table of Contents links are active; just click on one and then click on the link that pops up under it.
To access the underlying Google Doc, click on the little rectangle in its upper right-hand corner. You can download that into various formats.
